The View From My Front Porch Has Taught Me A Lot

I’m used to incredible views as we travel around the United States together. We get to see so many new places and meet new people. My recent view (much like many of you) is the green grass I see from my front porch.

Day in and day out, I’ve stepped out onto my stoop, and each time my thoughts have changed. At first, I felt nothing but anxiety, doubt, and fear. I had too many questions about the future and not enough answers.

Then, I felt depressed. I couldn’t shake it no matter how hard I tried. The future looked bleak, uncertain and very long. Quarantine was starting to take its toll in a big way.

Recently, I’ve enjoyed a newfound peace and calm happiness. I’m oddly grateful for this insane and intense moment in time. I’m not thankful for the virus or the millions of people affected by it. I would gladly give up the positives I’ve experienced to see it all go away.

But since it looks like coronavirus is here to stay, I’m going to focus on the tiny silver lining.

Here’s what I shared on Instagram a couple of days ago.

I’ll remember…⠀

The suffocating feeling of wearing a mask⠀

The anxiety of being in public⠀

Worrying that my mom would die from this terrible virus ⠀

Missing my friends and family and not knowing when I would see them again⠀

My kids will remember…

Getting to skip naps once in a while ⠀

Staying up late to play games with the family ⠀

Movie nights cuddled up on the couch or the living room floor ⠀

Eating lots of treats that mommy baked throughout the week ⠀

Building an epic backyard playground with daddy⠀

I’m so glad we’re in this together so that I can hang onto his memories 

Those words explain so much about what I’ve learned. It is hard not to get lost inside my head with all that’s going on. I’ve learned that I need to try harder to get lost in what my kids are thinking, feeling and experiencing. There is so much beauty there.

On the flip side, they’re feeling fear and anxiety too. I’ve learned that I need to be in that with my kids and let them go through it.

And sometimes we need to sit on our front porch and enjoy the view together. These are precious moments, and I’ve decided to stop wishing them away.  

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